Hope Dances In The Puddles...

 I can't write about a weight loss this week because I didn't lose. I actually gained a little over a pound. But I'm not going to stress over it, just have to eat differently than I did last week. "If you eat what you've always eatin, you'll weigh what you've always weighed." Some days I agree with that, some days I don't. It's all about proportion, and that is my opinion and my opinion only. =)

I've been being a little impatient in a particular area in my life and despite how much I long for it the devil continuously tries to convince me that it will never happen. (i.e. because of the mistakes I've made in my past, that I don't deserve it, that I wouldn't be good at it.. etc. etc.)

Now I know very well that God's word tell me differently, that the Lord says "...plans to give you hope and a future." [Jremiah 29:11] and I trust in what that verse says, but there are just some days/weeks I get into this funk where my fears get the best of me, and then they just take completely over my thoughts/emotions/everything, and keeps me from being excited about what the future holds. When I'm in that place, I just can't see past it and feel like there's no light at the end of the tunnel.

I've been having some of those days here lately. Especially last night, until I went through my mail and found this.....

A truly sweet friend sent me this card. It was like someone throwing me a life jacket

{or maybe just some rainboots ;)}, while I was drowning in my little puddle.

It was filled with a sweet handwritin message of encouragement and a great reminder. The Lord does promise to give us the desires of our hearts. I just need to remember it's in His timing, not my own. I am so thankful to this person, for being the person that she is, that she would send me a card so personal even though we aren't that close. [And I don't think that will be the case for very much longer ;)]

Then this morning on my way to work the Kari Jobe CD I was listening to just "happened" to be on just the song I needed to start my day with. I'm so glad the Lord uses music to remind me and sometimes even teach me things. He is always so faithful in doing it at just the right time. Which makes me love Him even more everytime He does.

Here are some (not all) of the lyrics to the song:

So faithful. So constant. So loving and so true.
So powerful in all You do.

You fill me. You see me.
You know my every move
and You love for me to sing to You.

I know that You are for me.
I know that You are for me.
I know that You will never,
forsake me in my weaknesses

I know that You have come now,
even if to write upon my heart.
To remind me who You are.

So patient, So gracious,
So merciful and true…So wonderful in all You do.

What I love most about this reminder that He showed me is that no matter how crazy I feel when my hormones are going hay-wire. Or how absolutely alone I feel in my emotions (which is just another way of saying my hormones are going hay-wire lol), He is patient with me and my doubts, He is constant in loving me and showing that love to me over and over again (even though He shouldn't have to), and He is ALWAYS with me...no matter how weak I am in my faith. He reminds me I don't have do anything without Him, He is always available to scoop me up and give me strength to make it through another "no".

I'm not sure that everyone would get the same thing out of that song. But It's what He spoke to my heart this morning and, as always, it's just what I needed.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. " Romans 15:13

I read a certain prayer somewhere else several months ago, but I haven't forgotten it and there is a part of it that I specifically want to make my own..

Lord, I know all this worrying is wrong and takes so much of my time and thoughts away from you. I am so sorry. I know that you are in control and that your plans for me are far greater than I could ever dream. I am so busy with everything on top of my fears that I feel like you are cheated out of so much time. "Help me to maximize my time for your glory somehow even when I feel so weak. Or, truthfully, so afraid that "today" is a picture of "forever".  Please take these blah feelings and turn them into contentment.  God, make me undistracted in my affections for you." I love you Lord and I'm trusting you.
In Jesus precious name, Amen.